It is always useful to face an enemy who is prepared to die for his country," he read. "This means that both you and he have exactly the same aim in mind.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

I feel a connection to many songs that I won't sing because I don't think they are right for me! There is something in my gut that immediately responds. There's no science to it.

[The photograph] is the object itself... [It] shares, by virtue of the very process of its becoming, the being of the model of which it is the reproduction; it is the model.

Everything I touched in the kitchen turned out crappy, no matter how closely I followed the recipe or copied the cooking show.

The defects of the mind, like those of the face, grow worse with age.

There are many, many art worlds. Art contains multitudes.

I went out with the same girl throughout all four years of high school.

You give before you get.

The United States has more women and girls in prison than any other industrialized nation on earth.

I don't think men talk as much as women, but when we have something on our minds we'll get it out.

I'd say that golf is about 75% mental. If your state of mind gets out of kilter, you're worse off than a tomcat floating on a log.