It is my last wish to be burried sitting up.

It's better to be hated for who you are, than to be loved for someone you're not. It's a sign of your worth sometimes, if you're hated by the right people.

You should never say bad things about the dead, you should only say good . . . Joan Crawford is dead. Good.

There comes a time in every woman's life when the only thing that helps is a glass of champagne.

Getting old is not for sissies.

Some young Hollywood starlets remind me of my grandmother's old farmhouse -- all painted up nice on the front side, a big swing on the backside, and nothing whatsoever in the attic.

You will never be happier than you expect. To change your happiness, change your expectation.

If everyone likes you, you're not doing it right.

A sure way to lose happiness, I found, is to want it at the expense of everything else.

If you've never been hated by your child, you've never been a parent.

My passions were all gathered together like fingers that made a fist. Drive is considered aggression today; I knew it then as purpose.

We all die one day, but jewels never fade or perish. Through our children we live. That’s how we cheat death.

What if things happened to you—special, magic things—because you’d been preparing for them?

I didn't go to university. Didn't even finish A-levels. But I have sympathy for those who did.

It seems beyond the comprehension of people that someone can be born to draw comic strips, but I think I was. My ambition from earliest memory was to produce a daily comic strip.

I'm constantly looking to see whether I look the same as I did earlier, whether I've put on or lost any weight.

You can't force someone to sell property in America.

There is nothing which so certifies the genuineness of a man's faith as his patience and his patient endurance, his keeping on steadily in spite of everything.

Horse sense is the instinct that keeps horses from betting on men.

Expertise in one field does not carry over into other fields. But experts often think so. The narrower their field of knowledge the more likely they are to think so.

I do the same thing every night, but different.