It is never difficult to distinguish between a Scotsman with a grievance and a ray of sunshine.

Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum.

There is only one cure for gray hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.

There is no surer foundation for a beautiful friendship than a mutual taste in literature.

I always advise people never to give advice.

The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun.

Gussie, a glutton for punishment, stared at himself in the mirror.

It was my Uncle George who discovered that alcohol was a food well in advance of modern medical thought.

As we grow older and realize more clearly the limitations of human happiness, we come to see that the only real and abiding pleasure in life is to give pleasure to other people.

The voice of Love seemed to call to me, but it was a wrong number.

A melancholy-looking man, he had the appearance of one who has searched for the leak in life's gas-pipe with a lighted candle.

Fill the canvas of life with the colors of peace bliss beauty and love.

I thought it'd be cool to start my own university, in a way.

Exaggeration is a branch of lying.

Our patience is not infinite. We're not willing to let this go on forever.

I was diagnosed with Graves' disease, an illness of the thyroid gland. Instead of surgery, I was given radiation treatment.

But, as you have intimated, I am among those who would be very wary of any military action in the light of Saddam Hussein's willingness to allow the weapons inspectors to go in.

Even if we're facing bigotry or racism, we can still be successful.

I don't think there is ever a wrong time for a polka dot.

When from a long distant past nothing subsists after the things are broken and scattered, the smell and taste of things remain.

It is a high distinction for a homely woman to be loved for her character rather than for beauty.