It is not the being paid money in advance that jars the sensitive artist: it is the having to work.

Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum.

There is only one cure for gray hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.

There is no surer foundation for a beautiful friendship than a mutual taste in literature.

It is never difficult to distinguish between a Scotsman with a grievance and a ray of sunshine.

I always advise people never to give advice.

The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun.

Gussie, a glutton for punishment, stared at himself in the mirror.

It was my Uncle George who discovered that alcohol was a food well in advance of modern medical thought.

As we grow older and realize more clearly the limitations of human happiness, we come to see that the only real and abiding pleasure in life is to give pleasure to other people.

The voice of Love seemed to call to me, but it was a wrong number.

I remember how amazing it felt to be loved by him and how he was all I ever wanted.

By the time a philospher answers a question weve usually forgotten what was asked.

When people campaign for positions, they promise people all kinds of things.

Leaders attract potential leaders.

I call myself a FFP: former fat person, and when you're an FFP, you will always see in yourself what people used to bully you for.

The inversion of external compulsion into the compulsion of conscience ... produces the machine-like assiduity and pliable allegiance required by the new rationality.

The road you travel might horribly get narrower; do not panic! Keep your spirits high; the road will get wider!

I also was producing, working on other materials for the hydrogen bomb. They call it lithium-6 and tritium. I was working on these and the only use for lithium-6 is the hydrogen bomb.

To be content with death may be better than to desire it.

Cause I shouldn't feel this way... Catch me I'm falling for you... and I don't know what to do.