It must be hard to cook if you anthropomorphisize your vegetables.

The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us.

Weekends don't count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless.

That's the difference between me and the rest of the world. Happiness isn't good enough for me! I demand euphoria!

Nothing helps a bad mood like spreading it around.

What fun is it being cool if you can't wear a sombrero?

We all have different desires and needs, but if we don't discover what we want from ourselves and what we stand for, we will live passively and unfulfilled.

When birds burp, it must taste like bugs.

The truth is, most of us discover where we are headed when we arrive.

There is not enough time to do all the nothing we want to do.

Selling out is usually more a matter of buying in. Sell out, and you’re really buying into someone else’s system of values, rules and rewards.

I've had so many bikini waxes, I cry every time I see a Popsicle stick.

I think you’re just as emotionally unavailable as I am. I avoid men because I’m afraid I’ll lose my heart, and you go from girl to girl to keep from giving yours away.

Hypocrisy is the essence of snobbery, but all snobbery is about the problem of belonging.

There are quiet ways to die where the body just doesn’t notice that the heart is gone.

In the trade pact you know that was recently agreed to, I said you have to talk about devaluation. Because that's been their [China] single greatest asset in terms of what they are doing to us.

Behind the lens, I found refuge and freedom, distance and connection, an intoxicating way to tame the huge, chaotic world.

Alex loved books. He was the one who first introduced me to poetry. That's another reason I can't read anymore.

I have the world heavyweight title not because it was 'given' to me, not because of my race or religion, but because I won it in the ring through my own boxing ability.

A person riding a unicycle on a tightrope doesn't worry about being likeable; they're doing something amazing that very few people can do.

Democracy cannot be exported to some other place. This must be a product of internal domestic development in a society.