It's a wonderful thing, the D.T.'s. You can travel the world in a couple of hours. You see some mighty funny and curious things that come in assorted colors.

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.

I spent half my money on gambling, alcohol and wild women. The other half I wasted.

The man in our society is the breadwinner; the woman has enough to do as the homemaker, wife and mother.

If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no point in being a damn fool about it.

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.

I exercise strong self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and furthermore always carry a small snake.

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.

How well I remember my first encounter with The Devil'ss Brew. I happened to stumble across a case of bourbon - and went right on stumbling for several days thereafter.

Your discipline or lack of discipline will protect you from or expose you to disaster. Practice discipline. Be consistent.

Nothing good can come from a crack of dawn meeting on a Monday morning.

Bug? You sack of sweat stink. I've got farts that smell sweeter than you. Think you're better than me? Poop ice cream cones, do you? Call me a bug! Rachel, let me do him now.

There's no problem so great it can't be solved. If it can't be solved, it's not a problem, it's reality.

Our meeting, touching, accidentally connecting immediately, interwoven hand-in-hand, heart-to-heart.

In the United States, anybody can be President. That's the problem.

People bore me. Film people particularly bore me. I prefer talking to my trees

The clarification of our political ideas insensibly changes into and becomes indistinguishable from the history of political ideas.

I don't know what a collective is exactly. But maybe there's one guy who makes sure everything is clean. Maybe I'm that guy.

My girlfriend: sophomore honors student, demigod, and — oh, yeah — head architect for redesigning the palace of the gods on Mount Olympus in her spare time.