It's better to have died a small child than to be a politician who gets caught in a scandal during a slow news month.

I know lots of people who are educated far beyond their intelligence.

It's difficult to think anything but pleasant thoughts while eating a homegrown tomato.

There's no such thing as being too Southern.

The game of life is a lot like football. You have to tackle your problems, block your fears, and score your points when you get the opportunity.

Baptists never make love standing up. They're afraid someone might see them and think they're dancing.

You call to a dog and a dog will break its neck to get to you. Dogs just want to please. Call to a cat and its attitude is, 'What's in it for me?'

Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and give her a house.

Life is like a dogsled race. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes.

The idiot who invented instant grits also thought of frozen fried chicken, and they ought to lock him up before he tries to freeze-dry collards.

I came from a big family. As a matter of fact, I never got to sleep alone until I was married.

Your body would not get sick if you held no thought of resentment. It is neither good nor bad of itself. If we hold anything against anyone, we will suffer ourselves.

If we will imagine the thing we want and do our part to “be in the right place at the right time, ” there isn’t anything we can’t do, be, or attain.

The easy assumption that we have remembered the most important people and events and have preserved the most valuable evidence is immediately trumped by our inability to know what we have forgotten.

The more candles on my cake means I get a little more exercise in blowing them out.

One may be "outside" the church, but one can never be "outside" of God's love.

Doing what's right is no guarantee against misfortune.

The thing I think about is that once you've done it, you then start to think about what you're going to do next. It's much easier to follow something that's not been as successful as this.

Listening is selecting and interpreting and acting and making decisions.

There is no goodness in people who don't give advice, and there is no goodness in people who don't like to be advised

I play some fighting games, but mostly I just play sports.