It's good to play and you must keep in practice.

Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun. You don't stare at it, it's too risky. You get a sense of it and then you look away.

These pretzels are making me thirsty!

Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason.

Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom.

The IRS! They're like the Mafia, they can take anything they want!

So let me get this straight. You find yourself in the kitchen. You see an éclair in the receptacle... and you think to yourself: "What the hell, I'll just eat some trash."

People who read the tabloids deserve to be lied to.

A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it.

Keep your head up in failure and your head down in success.

Airline hostesses show you how to use a seatbelt in case you haven't been in a car since 1965.

Some words are wind, ser. Some are treason.

One of the characteristics of the dream is that nothing surprises us in it.

Who the hell was this woman that he shared a bed with? A life with. Anger and raw pain surged through Harrison as he wondered if he really had married a stranger.

When I was younger I was completely without money - when I was studying in Budapest, when I was a refugee.

Your children learn more of your faith during the bad times than they do during the good times.

Keep Darwinian thinking out of cosmology, out of psychology, out of human culture, out of ethics, politics, and religion!

Every week when my batch of weekly cartoons would go to FedEx, it felt like a small miracle. Then in a few days, it's 'Here we go again.'

The problem with golf is I have to deal with a humiliation factor.

Protest against Industrial Capitalism from one aspect or another is universal: so was the protest against the condition of European religion at the beginning of the sixteenth century.

Canvas. J.C. Penney. $3.98. You like?