It's nice to worry about playing golf and not all the other stuff.

I believe nicotine plus caffeine equals protein.

I don't think I've ever stepped into a gym - they won't let me smoke there. I just thank God Miller Lite isn't as fattening as most beers. If I cut back on beer, though, I'd look anorexic.

I was never able to have three of four beers. One's too many, and ten just ain't enough. Basically it's the way I've been since high school.

I hit the ball as hard as I can. If I can find it, I hit it again.

Life is nothing but a memory. People who dwell on the bad ones aren't going to have a whole lot of good ones coming up.

This fitness thing is blown out of proportion. What am I going to do on a treadmill - smoke a cigarette and drink a diet Coke?

There are probably some things I could do to keep my flexibility up, but I'd rather smoke, drink diet Cokes and eat.

I enjoy the oohs! and aahs! from the gallery when I hit my drives. But I'm getting pretty tired of the awws! and uhhs! when I miss the putt.

My slogan is who needs fitness when you've got great equipment.

I learned you can't drink whiskey and play golf.

What the culture of get rich quick does to our people is young men only wish to do prestigious work

And so the merry party began. It was one of those jolly, happy, bread-crumbling parties where you cough twice before you speak, and then decide not to say it after all.

My roots and Victor's are jazz, basically, but these two young fellows that we have with us come out of rock bands. And they're tremendously exciting players.

Englishmen hate Liberty and Equality too much to understand them. But every Englishman loves a pedigree.

Most cities are nouns. New York's a verb.

If you want something, go get it.

Two wrongs don't make it right, but it damn sure makes us even.

Volume depends precisely on the writer's having been able to sit in a room every day, year after year, alone.

There will come into every life moments of despair and the need for direction from a divine source-even an unspoken plea for help.

A mighty stream of tendency.