It's very hard not to be condescending when you're explaining something to an idiot.

I have a problem with people who take the Constitution loosely and the Bible literally.

The reason I love my dog so much is because when I come home, he's the only one in the world who treats me like I'm the Beatles.

Let's face it; God has a big ego problem. Why do we always have to worship him?

The problem is that the people with the most ridiculous ideas are always the people who are most certain of them.

If you have a gun, you can rob a bank, but if you have a bank, you can rob everyone.

False hope really makes you cynical.

To a coward, courage always looks like stupidity.

It's not getting any better for the American people. It seems to be getting worse. That's predictable; education is a cycle. Stupidity breeds more stupidity.

You know what happens when windmills collapse into the sea? A splash.

Here's the thing about Donald Trump: He never apologizes. He's never wrong, no matter what crazy thing he says. He's totally - he's the white Kanye.

Nothing flatters a man as much as the happiness of his wife he is always proud of himself as the source of it.

Never be afraid of failure. And don't stop yourself from doing something you want to do because of what others might think. Only you know yourself best.

I don't feel famous and I didn't want my autobiography to be like a Paris Hilton story.

Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince, and dinner like a pauper.

I turn the tables and challenge our people, our scouts, and they respond. We had a meeting with our scouts this week and told them [we] will use and value their opinions. That perks them up.

the tentacles of today reach out like an octopus to swallow yesterday.

Memory is the medium of the must-have-been.

In design, be logical, search for truth, be clear.

Can we expect [Donald] Trump to have a thicker skin as president?

The eye is the most refined of our senses, the one which communicates most directly with our mind, our consciousness.