It was just a compulsion. In fact, I soon realized that the only thing I really enjoyed was the actual snorting.

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me . . they’re cramming for their final exam.

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.

All the media and the politicians ever talk about is things that separate us, things that make us different from one another

Don’t just teach your children to read… Teach them to question what they read. Teach them to question everything.

In America, anyone can become president. That's the problem.

Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.

There is a planet named Pluto, but we don't have one named Goofy. Goofy would be a good name for this planet. It certainly qualifies.

A Loveless Life is Like a Rudderless Ship Floating Uncontrollably in the Ocean of Life.

I'm not asking you to walk in my shoes

Some evangelists spend too much time thinking and even planning about how to achieve visible results. This is an easy trap to fall into.

Each character represented a trait that resides in me.

I always questioned if I was CALLED to adopt, but then I realized no child was ever CALLED to be an orphan.

I really don't feel that writing is therapy.

For as long as one has no further point of reference, apart from the position of the maximum, the wavelength thus remains uncertain by an integral factor.

The TARP program was nevertheless necessary to keep banks from collapsing in a cascade of failures.

The only thing that stops God from sending another flood is that the first one was useless.

The educational system is pretty much geared to passing the next exam. You're educated to pass tests and not to understand.