It won't happen yet, Ellen mused, mashing cooked carrots for Jill's lunch. Breakups seldom do. It will unfold slowly, one little tell-tale symptom after another like some awful, hellish flower.

Please don’t expect me to always be good and kind and loving. There are times when I will be cold and thoughtless and hard to understand.

If I didn’t think, I’d be much happier.

If you expect nothing from anybody, you’re never disappointed.

I ride earth's burning carousel. Day in, day out.

What horrifies me most is the idea of being useless: well-educated, brilliantly promising, and fading out into an indifferent middle age.

Go out and do something. It isn’t your room that’s a prison, it’s yourself.

I desire the things that will destroy me in the end.

And by the way, everything in life is writable about if you have the outgoing guts to do it, and the imagination to improvise. The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt.

If neurotic is wanting two mutually exclusive things at one and the same time, then I'm neurotic as hell.

Perhaps some day I'll crawl back home, beaten, defeated. But not as long as I can make stories out of my heartbreak, beauty out of sorrow.

As an adult, getting paid thousands of dollars a week to say, “Aye, Sir. Course laid in” is a seriously sweet gig, but when I was a teenager, it sucked.

you simply couldn't guard yourself against dreams. they attacked late at night when a person was at the most vulnerable.

Take shots at em, I guess you could call it a parody. But compared to D, they one-fourth from watermelon to a quarter felon, dude you a pear to me.

The basis of art is change in the universe.

She hadn't slain the dragon. Not at all. She hoped no one ever would.

I think people are tuning out the political class, tuning out the national media, and the American people are just gonna - we're just gonna demand government as good as our people again.

I think it'd be great if Prince made an album of just romantic, slow ballads.

[The satirist] must fully possess, at least in the world of the imagination, the quality the lack of which he is deriding in others.

I see things like they've never been seen before. Art is an accurate statement of the time in which it is made.

The topic of working moms is a tap-dance recital in a minefield.