It would be hypocritical of me to take issue with anything in questionable taste, seeing that I invented bad taste in films.

My mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives.

As long as the world is turning and spinning, we're gonna be dizzy and we're gonna make mistakes.

I've been accused of vulgarity. I say that's bullshit.

If you stand on a soapbox and trade rhetoric with a dictator you never win.

Hope for the Best. Expect the worst. Life is a play. We're unrehearsed.

Life literally abounds in comedy if you just look around you.

If presidents can't do it to their wives, they do it to their country.

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die.

Humor is just another defense against the universe.

I don't know what to say so I'll just say what's in my heart...badoom, badoom, badoom.

Resistance is a sign that shows you're going the right way

Love in the real world means saying you're sorry 10 times a day.

...in the end every one stands alone, and the important thing is who it is that stands alone.

Absolute monarchy,... is the easiest death, the true Euthanasia of the BRITISH constitution.

It is not the mountain we conquer, but ourselves.

Perseverance does not equal worthiness. Next time you want to get my attention, wear something fun. Low-riding jeans are hot.

You are fortunate to live here. If I were your President, I would levy a tax on you for living in San Francisco!

Pray absolutely for those things you may pray for absolutely. Pray conditionally for those things you may pray for conditionally. For those things you can't pray for - don't.

People like to see human error when it’s honest. When people see you swing and miss, they start to root for you.

If you wanna maintain 20 percent of the world's income with 4 percent of the world's people, you gotta first of all have more shared prosperity and shared growth.