Its all in the mind, you know.

You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all the people some of the time, which is just long enough to be president of the United States.

Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it's all in perfect working order.

I can speak Esperanto like a native.

Money can't buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, get it out with Optrex.

All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy.

Chopsticks are one of the reasons the Chinese never invented custard.

How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.

Said Hamlet to Ophelia, I'll draw a sketch of thee. What kind of pencil shall I use? 2B or not 2B?

We haven't got a plan so nothing can go wrong!

But what of black women?... I most sincerely doubt if any other race of women could have brought its fineness up through so devilish a fire.

Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.

Cantonese will eat anything in the sky but airplanes, anything in the sea but submarines, and anything with four legs but the table.

Stories,' the green-eyed Sigrid said, unperturbed, 'are like prayers. It does not matter when you begin, or when you end, only that you bend a knee and say the words.

I really don't look at comparing things that way because even in a 14-game season, there could be a running back who could have a lot more carries than other running backs.

Public works are not accomplished by the miraculous power of a magic wand. They are paid for by funds taken away from the citizens.

We take our international responsibilities very seriously and will not withdraw our troops from Iraq... Otherwise, the victims of terror in Madrid will have died in vain.

But it's really hard to eat good when you're traveling because you see fast food and you want to go to this restaurant and that restaurant.

You know what rumors are like-like a jar full of moths. Once they escape, they're all over the place.

[On her monologue as the thief 'Fontaine':] People always got things. People always want things. So I provide a service.