Just as some things are too strange for fiction, others are too true for journalism.

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible.

Mercedes Benz : A mechanical device that increases sexual arousal in women.

Tabasco sauce is to bachelor cooking what forgiveness is to sin.

A firm, hearty handshake gives a good first impression, and you'll never be forgiven if you don't live up to it.

At the core of liberalism is the spoiled child — miserable, as all spoiled children are, unsatisfied, demanding, ill-disciplined, despotic and useless. Liberalism is a philosophy of sniveling brats.

There's a whiff of the lynch mob or the lemming migration about any overlarge concentration of like-thinking individuals, no matter how virtuous their cause.

Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death very carefully to your child. This will make threatening him with it much more effective.

Watching Republicans in Washington is like watching lemmings, if lemmings jumped into cesspools instead of off cliffs. Splash! There goes Mark Foley!

Authority has always attracted the lowest elements in the human race

What a comfort it was for me to know that no matter where I was in the world, my mother was praying for me.

Work means independence. It allowed me to shape my life on so many levels.

I also discovered that I was a poet. From the standpoint of one's family this is probably a regrettable discovery.

Singing is my main goal, and I think philosophy will help me write songs.

New York has total depth in every area. Washington has only politics; after that, the second biggest thing is white marble.

What sounds good on the radio is really loud kick drums and loud snare drums, when everything's bombastic and in your face. It's the equivalent of a houseguest who screams all the time.

Jackson doesn't bother to read the scripts anymore. He just checks to make sure he has one loud scene where he gets to shout, then cashes the paycheck.

One social evil for which the New Testament is clearly in part responsible is anti-Semitism.

Do not allow yourself to imagine that revolutionary thinking can be propagated by governmental power.

Greeting cards routinely tell us everybody deserves love. No. Everybody deserves clean water. Not everybody deserves love all the time.