Just when I discovered the meaning of life, they changed it.

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me . . they’re cramming for their final exam.

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.

All the media and the politicians ever talk about is things that separate us, things that make us different from one another

Don’t just teach your children to read… Teach them to question what they read. Teach them to question everything.

In America, anyone can become president. That's the problem.

Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.

There is a planet named Pluto, but we don't have one named Goofy. Goofy would be a good name for this planet. It certainly qualifies.

do something whilst others think you cannot do anything

It's all about escapism. That's essentially what all movies are about. It's a vicarious thrill.

I've always had a problem with people who couldn't tell the truth or admit a mistake and say they're wrong.

Awards mean a lot, but they don't say it all. The people in baseball mean more to me than statistics.

I liked the education. I liked people learning things all around me and I liked going to people's classes.

My iPhone stays on. All my friends and family know that I hate the phone, so no one calls me on it. I just use it to play Words With Friends and take pictures of cute shoes.

It is characteristic of science that the full explanations are often seized in their essence by the percipient scientist long in advance of any possible proof.

If the children already born each have only two children themselves ... in twenty-seven to thirty-five years the population of the world will double.

If your child marches to a different beat, a different drummer, you might just have to go along with that music. Help them achieve what’s important to them.

Study your subject through half-closed eyes before starting to draw - you'll find that the lights and darks are exaggerated and easier to identify.