Life is an infiltration course. We all try and get through it. We all try and get through it unscathed - maybe not hurt, not bruised. No bones broken, maybe a few hearts here and there.

I keep going because if you stop, you stop. Why retire? Inspire.

You always pass failure on the way to success.

Dont retire - inspire...Theres a lot to be done

Always get married in the morning. That way if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted the whole day.

Look, I come from vaudeville, I come from burlesque, I come from heartaches, I come from sadness, I come from gladness, I come from work and sweat and respect for the craft.

I hear Jerry Falwell every Sunday here talking about the devil and Hollywood. . . . I'm gonna write him a letter. Hollywood wasn't built on filth and dirt - it was built on talent.

I don't regret anything I've ever done. I only wish I could have done more.

And that's the way I have always lived, for the laughs – today. N-O-W. No Other Way.

Someone once asked me what I want on my epitaph when I pass away. Just the words 'I tried.' That's what this game of life is all about. Trying. There's the tryers, the criers, and the liars.

A lot of people have asked me how short I am. Since my last divorce, I think I'm about $100,000 short.

Faith is faith.

Your life is like a coin. You can spend it anyway you want, but only once. Make sure you invest it and don't waste it. Invest it in something that matters to you and matters for eternity.

Memory always obeys the commands of the heart.

Faith is the power to stand up to the madness and chaos of the physical world, while holding the position that nothing external has any authority over what heaven has in mind for you.

We never believed that we'd just tumble over weapons of mass destruction in that country.

The media's job is to question a premise.

Repartee is the soul of conversation.

The duty of the branch is to cling to the vine.

Skepticism doesn't help you hear.

I've never understood why people run to get out of the rain in the summertime... People will drive miles and miles to go jump in a cool swimming hole, but when it rains, they scatter.