Life took over 4 billion years to evolve into you, and you've about 70 more years to enjoy it. Don't just pursue happiness, catch it.

I believe in the separation of church and planet.

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will make me go in a corner and cry by myself for hours.

A lot has been said about politics; some of it complimentary, but most of it accurate

Learn to trust yourself. That's very vital. ... Just stand with yourself. Remember, in his lifetime, Van Gogh sold only two paintings. I personally sold even fewer.

Life doesn't make any sense, and we all pretend it does. Comedy's job is to point out that it doesn't make sense, and that it doesn't make much difference anyway.

Life is a comedy when watching and a tragedy when experiencing. I try and share anything I have.

Never do things for money. It's always the things you do for love that turn out to pay the best.

Life has a very simple plot: first you're here and then you're not.

I've got soggy thighs. It must be dinner time.

Of the sparkling wines, the most famous is Perth Pink. This is a bottle with a message in, and the message is "beware". This is not a wine for drinking; this is a wine for laying down and avoiding.

A double-minded person is unstable in all his doing

Sometimes people did this, closed their eyes for a few seconds and imagined it gave them insights into what it was like to be her. Only, at the end, they could still open their eyes and see.

I like to make them squirm.

Chin up, don’t smile, don’t cry, don’t fall, walk.

Find a space where you can be creative and a place where you are open for free thinking, you want to enjoy what you are doing and do what you are best at.

It was the kind of place you went when your earthly troubles became too much for you and you were looking for a creative way to commit suicide.

The American Jewish Committee has pioneered the German-Jewish-American dialogue.

The number-one rule of the road is never go to bed with anyone crazier than yourself. You will break this rule, and you will be sorry.

I don’t want to achieve my dream. I just want to pursue my dream until I die.

I think I love jokes! The best jokes are equal to the best art, in my mind, and as rare.