Life was a lot simpler when what we honored was father and mother rather than all major credit cards.

Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work.

Planned obsolescence is not really a new concept. God used it with people.

If you think education is expensive, try ignorance.

There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all.

If at first you don't succeed-try, try again. Don't think of it as failure. Think of it as timed-release success.

A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed in identical caps and gowns that 'individuality' is the key to success.

Love is so confusing - you tell a girl she looks great and what's the first thing you do? Turn out the lights!

Time flies. It's up to you to be the navigator.

Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any Indian.

Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get.

A good manager will always have the big picture in mind and guide the employees through a series of small targets in order to achieve overall success.

Lord, let me make a difference for you that is utterly disproportionate to who I am.

Venice, the most touristy place in the world, is still just completely magic to me.

I love in Notting Hill. You live in Beverly Hills. Everyone in the world knows who you are. My mother has trouble remembering my name.

If Jesus were playing the game, I don't know what he'd do.

It don't take long to kill things. Not like it does to grow.

Sometimes a faint voice based on instinct resonates far more strongly than overpowering logic.

We're all influenced by everything unless we're locked in an empty room.

It’s important not to be embarrassed by your past. The contradictions are part of what we are.

Love is not the dying moan of a distant violin - it's the triumphant twang of a bedspring.