'Light fuse and get away' may work for a Roman candle, but not so much for the wrath of a woman scorned.

A good relationship is like fireworks: loud, explosive, and liable to maim you if you hold on too long.

You can either hold yourself up to the unrealistic standards of others, or ignore them and concentrate on being happy with yourself as you are.

That's what college is for - getting as many bad decisions as possible out of the way before you're forced into the real world. I keep a checklist of 'em on the wall in my room.

There are two ways to pass a hurdle: leaping over or plowing through... There needs to be a monster truck option.

If only corporal punishment cured low self-esteem.

Bachelor's degrees make pretty good placemats if you get 'em laminated.

The quickest way to a man's heart really is through his stomach, because then you don't have to chop through that pesky rib cage.

The TV Tropes QC page is every single idiotic comment from my forums distilled into one HTML document.

The trick to writer's block is to sack up and write through it, you see.

Your whole life people tell you to do what you love. But if you gotta do something else to pay the bills, you don't automatically have to be miserable.

You never fully appreciate what you had until you don’t have it anymore

Sometimes you just want to get away and be normal for a few days. It's a treat to travel without your racket bag.

In my opinion, no single design is apt to be optimal for everyone.

I've never walked out of a room and had a disagreement as to what was said.

I think it does, a little, hurt to be photographed.

We're always trying to really ground it, and I use this term a thousand times, it's a score I want people to feel and not necessarily hear.

Enmity is anger watching the opportunity for revenge.

As a cameraman, I was paid to stand within a few feet of Yehudi Menuhin performing. I saw Rudolph Nureyev dancing. I couldn't believe I was being paid for that.

Runners don't run with their legs, they run ON their legs. In reality, they run with their Arms!

Looks like the safest spot here for a human who doesn’t want to get eaten. (Kish)