Listen to authority figures because of their position, but only believe them if they can explain why.

I am Shiva, Destroyer of Worlds.

The devil doesn't come dressed in a red cape and pointy horns. He comes as everything you've ever wished for.

You show me a truly funny girl who doesn't have emotional issues, and I'll introduce you to my stable of unicorn thoroughbreds ridden by leprechaun jockeys.

Men will treat you the way you let them. There is no such thing as 'deserving' respect; you get what you demand from people.

The great stories go to those who aren't afraid to live them

You ever wake up in the middle of the night because a couple of cats are clawing each other to death outside your window? That's what it's like listening to you speak.

I will never understand why people get so upset at things I don't even remember saying.

I laugh at people who say things like 'I'm a good person, I just do bad things.' No, that's not how it works. What you do IS who you are.

The hardest lesson I've had to learn in my life is that my intelligence is inversely correlated to my humility. The more I thought I knew, the less I actually knew.

The narcissist act is not an act. I actually am a narcissist, very much so. My world revolves around me.

Daily reading of scriptures is essential for your spiritual growth.

The real form of abuse is not a physical torture

You have enough to create what you want.

The Law of Triviality... briefly stated, it means that the time spent on any item of the agenda will be in inverse proportion to the sum involved.

To eat and drink without a friend is to devour like the lion and the wolf.

Nothing is more deadly than a deserted, waiting street.

We were writing songs about girls when we still thought girls had cooties.

With Shakespeare, if you're not going to do the iambic pentameter, do some other play.

I want to do drama - no one really sees that. People just think I'm the funny guy and I can't do anything else, and that's just not true.

Read. Forget everything you've been told about books and read.