Long conversations with pals when neither you nor they have had a drink can be a test of palship.

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible.

Mercedes Benz : A mechanical device that increases sexual arousal in women.

Tabasco sauce is to bachelor cooking what forgiveness is to sin.

A firm, hearty handshake gives a good first impression, and you'll never be forgiven if you don't live up to it.

At the core of liberalism is the spoiled child — miserable, as all spoiled children are, unsatisfied, demanding, ill-disciplined, despotic and useless. Liberalism is a philosophy of sniveling brats.

There's a whiff of the lynch mob or the lemming migration about any overlarge concentration of like-thinking individuals, no matter how virtuous their cause.

Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death very carefully to your child. This will make threatening him with it much more effective.

Watching Republicans in Washington is like watching lemmings, if lemmings jumped into cesspools instead of off cliffs. Splash! There goes Mark Foley!

Authority has always attracted the lowest elements in the human race

Anger repressed can poison a relationship as surely as the crudest words.

It is astonishing how short a time it takes for very wonderful things to happen.

If we have no inner peace, we deceive ourselves into thinking that comfort and prosperity will bring happiness.

Most recently I read Michael Lewis "Boomerang." The other guy I love is Bill Bryson.

O help me Father in heaven to overcome and resist temptation in every form or shape.

He shouldn't have resigned over that game. It was not a bad performance; in fact it was quite a good one for England. I would not have resigned under those circumstances.

The world has lost the power to blush over its vice; the Church has lost her power to weep over it.

I'm a bisexual; I get it maybe twice a year.

The fields stretch out in long unbroken rows. We walk aware of what is far and close. Here distance is familiar as a friend. The feud we kept with space comes to an end.

The Siren waits thee, singing song for song.