Luck is merely a product of the happily delusional mind.

False hope is better than no hope at all.

Love is like skydiving without a parachute.

Of course I believe in hell. I have three brothers.

A guy's got to get a license to drive a Geo, but any doofus with a few good swimmers can be a father.

Sometimes we succeed because of our upbringing, sometimes we do so in spite of it.

A person without regrets is called a corpse.

A wedding is no way to begin a marriage.

What if there's no such thing as PMS and this is just my personality?

Tact is for people with too much damned time on their hands.

Maybe curiosity did kill your cat. But it wouldn't hurt to keep an eye on the neighbor's rottweiler just the same.

The commencement of all labor consisted in the preparation of his own soul.

It's sort of my go-to stock image of my childhood, actually. I think it has something to do with knowing I'll never be able to go back to that time that makes me cry every time I listen to it.

An arena large as Europe Silent waiting the contest

A person needs at intervals to separate himself from family and companions and go to new places. He must go without his familiars in order to be open to influence to change.

Let's abolish the term 'childish' because adults normally cause the largest problems.

There is a very difficult period in a comedian's career - it's that window of time where you're good enough to draw tickets but nobody knows you yet.

I could not help being struck with the foolishness of that institution which treated me as if I were mere flesh and blood and bones, to be locked up.

Everybody's old enough for a beer, ain't that right, Mule?

Beauty and truth may be attributes of good writing, but if the writer deliberately aims at truth, he is likely to find that what he has hit is the didactic.

Prayer gives us light by which to see and to judge from God's perspective and from eternity. That is why you must not give up on praying!