Marriage is the only known example of the happy meeting of the immovable object and the irresistible force.

Some tortures are physical And some are mental, But the one that is both Is dental.

Middle-age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you.

I would live all my life in nonchalance and insouciance, were it not for making living, which is rather a nouciance.

The door of a bigoted mind opens outwards so that the only result of the pressure of facts upon it is to close it more snugly.

Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.

Behold the Zebra on the plains, And shudder at his mighty manes!

The bed is a bundle of paradoxes: we go to it with reluctance, yet we quit it with regret; we make up our minds every night to leave it early, but we make up our bodies every morning to keep it late.

When I remember bygone days I think how evening follows morn So many I loved were not yet dead, So many I love were not yet born.

Whenever you're wrong, admit it; Whenever you're right, shut up.

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them.

I'm not good at a lot of things. I am not good at keeping my room clean. I am not good at eating healthy. I am not good at sports anymore. I used to be! Not so much anymore.

If the prodigal quits life in debt to others, the miser quits it still deeper in debt to himself.

Personality is a person among persons. There is no personality of one man on a desert island.

Only when you can accept that you are alone, will you discover that you are not alone.

I may not get there with you, but I believe that we as a people will someday reach the promised land.

Yeah, me and Q-Tip is cool outside of the business, but you know, within the business sometimes it can get ugly, you know what I mean?

I happen to think like a man, and do certain things guys like to do. I grew up around boys.

I'm used to short distances and short bursts of energy; it was just fastest

Geometry is the only science that it hath pleased God hitherto to bestow on mankind.

2004 was a great year for Boston! The Patriots won the Super Bowl! Boston hosted its first national political convention! And - the Red Sox won the World Series!