Maybe the only significant difference between a really smart simulation and a human being was the noise they made when you punched them.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

Education is the movement from darkness to light.

I grew up watching a lot of stuff, like 'Teen Titans.'

In every guilty man, there is some innocence. This makes every absolute condemnation revolting.

It's interesting to be an adult and to have that level of ignorance about something, because the nice part about is you get that discovery. The learning curve is so rich and steep.

For strength to bear is found in duty alone, and he is blest indeed who learns to make the joy of others cure his own heartache.

...An honest conversation with anyone is a form of praying.

Location: Amsterdam, Where Fire Is Called "Vlam

We need enlightenment, not just individually but collectively, to save the planet.

For some reason, all my characters come to me with their names attached to them. I never have to search for the names.

The English reputation for humour is a way by which people avoid revealing themselves and have superficial relationships, so that you can engage in banter without making yourself vulnerable.