Men are like parking spots: sometimes I drive my car into them

This is a pretty shitty flash mob. It's in my living room, only my family showed up, and they're just telling me to stop drinking.

Why do we 'drive' on a 'parkway' but 'park' at a 'strip club'?

I think very long and hard about every possibly offensive joke I want to make. I really hate mean humor and would hate to make anyone reading my jokes feel truly bad.

As long as we have unsolved problems, unfulfilled desires, and a mustard seed of faith, we have all we need for a vibrant prayer life.

How can a God who said, “Love your enemies” spend so much time killing His own?

I like the sitcom, as a structure.

What can Labor do for itself? The answer is not difficult. Labor can organize, it can unify; it can consolidate its forces. This done, it can demand and command.

Education is what is left after all that has been learnt is forgotten.

I really don't have any secrets. I've never met a photographer whose work I respected that had a secret because the secret lies within each and every one of us.

At the end of the archana, prostrate, then get up and, remaining on the same spot, turn around clockwise 3 times just as if circling a temple, then bow to the Lord.

I can show you where to dig, and what to dig for, but the digging you must do for yourself.

Spoon the sauce over the ice cream. It will harden. This is what you have been working for.

The only thing that lasts longer than a friend's love is the stupidity that keeps us from knowing any better.