Men become civilized, not in proportion to their willingness to believe, but in proportion to their readiness to doubt.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.

I don't know if ghouls are allowed to live either. But there has to be a reason we exist.

You will never be lonely on the right path because the truth itself is the best companion a person can ever have!

If you aren't fired with enthusiasm you'll be fired with enthusiasm.

When taxidermy is done well it's an amazing piece of art.

I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life. No one comes to the Father except through me.

The mark of a mature programmer is willingness to throw out code you spent time on when you realize it's pointless

Certainly, because the computer and computer language was still not as common as it is today. That's one of the reasons I believe Tron wasn't as popular back then as it is today.

The first inventions of commerce are, like those of all other arts, cunning and short-sighted.

It's not the critic who counts.

The nominal budget is a poor indicator of the impact of government outlays and revenues.