Men lie the most, women tell the biggest lies... a man's lie is, "I'm at Tony house, I was at Kenny house!" A woman lie is like, "It's your baby!"

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.

Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look for movies with white guys falling out of them.

Everyone has favorite criminals. Mine are pimps. We can all rob a bank; we can all sell drugs. Being a pimp is a whole other thing.

So, to say Barack Obama is progress is saying that he's the first black person that is qualified to be president. That's not black progress. That's white progress.

Wealth is not about having a lot of money; it's about having a lot of options.

The advantage that my children have is that my children are encountering the nicest white people that America has ever produced. Let’s hope America keeps producing nicer white people.

I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity.

Most people don't realize this, but you can eat organic, all natural, gluten-free food without telling everyone around you.

Smart is knowing if you're dumb. Knowing when to shut up and to listen to people that are smarter than you.

You know the world is messed up when the tallest man in the NBA is Chinese, the best golfer is black, and the best rapper is white.

For where thy treasure is, there also will thy heart be.

Questions and answers is a big space, and there are lots of possible systems that you can create for different goals.

To me, there's no greater reward than being around people you care about and can be present with.

The man who wins is the man who hangs on just five minutes longer after everyone else has quit.

I like fashion. I like being in shape. I like to look nice and I like to make money, but I don't think that's the most, No. 1, important thing.

I think our sensibility is not modernist anymore, that is, sensibility of people who are interested in art and literature.

There are so many brilliant women on television right now.

For me, life is writing and I can do it anywhere. It doesn't matter where I am. I listen. I write. I live.

Mitt Romney's numbers are crushing Donald Trump's numbers with women. Crushing them.

I'm really happy with all the art that was inspired by religion, and I think I'd be tickled to little tiny pieces if art in the future was inspired by other things.