Men who listen to classical music tend not to spit.

I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was Always.

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.

It wasn't that no one asked me to the prom, it was that no one would tell me where it was.

I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor's office was full of portraits by Picasso.

I don't want to push the envelope. Let the envelope stay in the middle of the table. I'll just make you laugh.

I was a ballerina. I had to quit after I injured a groin muscle. It wasn't mine.

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

The word 'aerobics' came about when the gym instructors got together and said: If we're going to charge $10 an hour, we can't call it Jumping up and down.

I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and say to myself "well, that's not going to happen

Art is a deception that creates real emotions - a lie that creates a truth. And when you give yourself over to that deception, it becomes magic.

When you travel, buy a historical book about the place, read to increase your knowledge on the beautiful places of the world.

I always ask the question "Is this what I want in my life?"

Those who never rebelled against God or at some point in their lives shaken their fists in the face of heaven, have never encountered God at all.

The older I get the more I admire and crave competence, just simple competence, in any field from adultery to zoology.

I find it very difficult to do normal things without getting approached.

When I was about 15, I picked up the guitar and learned how to play by going through Beatles chords books. I got this Christmas gift with the entire Beatles catalog.

I just don't know a couple that's been married more than three years that doesn't annoy the heck out of each other every 15 minutes.

All... natural rights may be abridged or modified in [their] exercise by law.

Life's real victories must be shared.