Milton Berle is an inspiration to every young person that wants to get into show business. Hard work, perseverance, and discipline: all the things you need...when you have no talent.

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

When your opponent's sittin' there holdin' all the aces, there's only one thing to do: kick over the table.

When the world seems to shine like you've had too much wine, that's amore.

If this is just the beginning, my life's gonna be beautiful.

I was so drunk last night I fell down and missed the floor.

I don't drink anymore... I freeze it and eat it like a popsicle.

It was a woman who drove me to drink. Come to think of it, I never did hang around to thank her for that. 'Hey lady! Do I look all blurry to you? 'Cause you look blurry to me!'

If you drink don't drive. Don't even putt.

Somewhere there's a someone for me. Though I may be lonely now, I'll see it through somehow, to somebody's heart I know I hold the key.

The world is the same you never change it, as sure as the stars shine above. Well, you're nobody til somebody loves you, so find yourself somebody to love.

True patriotism is doing something for your country.

It is true that I was born in Iowa, but I can't speak for my twin sister.

Somewhere there is a map of how it can be done.

Well, actually, I did start out in comedies. Very, very early.

Transformation isn't a future event, it's a present day activity

I needed to hear the world but didn't want the world to know I was listening.

The mother is the early care giver and primary source of identification for all children.... A daughter continues to identify with the mother

Kenya doesn't have much of an infrastructure for hosting a film.

Better to be judged by twelve than carried by six