Misogynist: A man who hates women as much as women hate one another.

Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.

On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.

The demagogue is one who preaches doctrines he knows to be untrue to men he knows to be idiots.

The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.

Morality is doing what is right, no matter what you are told. Religion is doing what you are told, no matter what is right.

Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.

Democracy is a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance.

The urge to save humanity is almost always a false front for the urge to rule.

It is inaccurate to say that I hate everything. I am strongly in favor of common sense, common honesty, and common decency. This makes me forever ineligible for public office.

Democracy is also a form of worship. It is the worship of Jackals by Jackasses.

Perfect is the enemy of good.

Learning the difference between God's intervention, the devil's mischief, and PMS can lead to increased happiness.

I love the smell of pastels...that breaths life into my soul.

She brushed the tears from their faces and sang them a melancholy lullaby. Her obvious devotion to her daughters pulled at my heart strings, making my chest ache with longing for my own mother.

To establish oneself in the world one has to do all one can to appear established.

I think sometimes my controlling instincts came out of a fear of other people.

Making one brilliant decision and a whole bunch of mediocre ones isn't as good as making a whole bunch of generally smart decisions throughout the whole process.

The future for Commander Tool Belt was not looking so hot.

Your dreams change. Initially the belly-buttons help establish the dreamer's predicament - the situation you are trapped in or held back by.

I cannot work fast enough. I cannot cope fast enough, really. And just releasing a film is hard.