Mitt Romney, maybe the most moral and decent man who's ever run for president, ended up being a murderer, somebody who didn't care about animals, and a tax cheat.

If Thomas Jefferson thought taxation without representation was bad, he should see how it is with representation.

Poverty is not the root cause of crime.

Liberals attempt through judicial activism what they cannot win at the ballot box.

We're not sexists, we're chauvinists - we're male chauvinist pigs, and we're happy to be because we think that's what men were destined to be. We think that's what women want.

End results that work that don’t involve government threaten liberals.

You know why there's a Second Amendment? In case the government fails to follow the first one.

Styrofoam and plastic milk jugs are biodegradable! Do you know what isn't biodegradable? Paper!

I think cigars are just a tremendous addition to the enjoyment of life.

The NAACP should have riot rehearsal. They should get a liquor store and practice robberies.

In a country of children where the option is Santa Claus or work, what wins?

Only the unprotected self can feel joy.

We must begin where we are and move forward immediately by starting small and capitalizing on what's at hand.

At our computer club, we talked about it being a revolution. Computers were going to belong to everyone, and give us power, and free us from the people who owned computers and all that stuff.

Like when I host a party. I hope my guests get along. But if not, how interesting!

Vienne la nuit sonne l'heure Les jours s'en vont je demeure

The whole world is absolutely brought up on lies. We are fed nothing but lies. It begins with lies and half our lives we live with lies.

A great deal of thought must be given to your daughter's marriage. Otherwise, she will simply slink off like a cat on a dark night to be fertilized under a bush to God knows whom!

I could wish for nothing more than to die for a childish dream in which I truly believed.

Try a little tenderness.

O Captain! My Captain! our fearful trip is done.