Models never say, "I'm hot." They say, "Look at these clothes." Whereas, with comedy, you have to say, "I'm hot."

If you're into social justice it's hard not to be on black people's side.

Whoever has the most at stake should have the most power.

The rules may seem obvious but when you think about them they're not. For somebody who has my job they're not as obvious as one would think.

The victory of the show is in the writing. Coming up with sketches and stand-up bits. The rest is just hitting buttons on a machine more or less.

When I say the n-word, black people are clear that I'm on their side. And it's not disingenuous - I am on black people's side, clearly.

People get way too much credit at funerals.

[Robert Smigel] is one of the greatest comedy writers in the last 50 years. "TV Funhouse" and Triumph and all those sketches.He's really unique, and he has an amazing comedy mind.

I think it's naïve to think white people aren't singing along directly!

I guess I like people doing roasts in public. That's my thing.

I'm making fun of midwestern homophobia [in the joke], but I'm still saying faggot. And almost every month as I'm doing that joke it gets five percent less of a laugh.

When mice run, cats give chase.

There were things I wanted to tell him. But I knew they would hurt him. So I buried them, and let them hurt me.

When we give government the power to make medical decisions for us, we in essence accept that the state owns our bodies.

It was her, something about her- whenever she did something that felt like a raw invitation, he simply went mad in his effort to take up the gauntlet.

Any fool can have bad luck the art consists in knowing how to exploit it.

I just hope that I get a chance to keep making pictures in the atmosphere of freedom to make mistakes, and to find those magical things. Then I don't care what else happens.

Rob Lowe is a sportsman and a ladykiller and it's impossible to be in a scene with him and not immediately begin to play tennis.

I don't want to pass through life like a smooth plane ride.

An eminent American is reported to have said to friends who wished to put him forward, 'Gentlemen, let there be no mistake. I should make a good president, but a very bad candidate.

My main thing is I'm gonna go out there every night and give it all I got and just try to put on the best show I can. That's just the way I'm programmed and wired.