Money is the best lotion in the world.

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.

Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look for movies with white guys falling out of them.

Everyone has favorite criminals. Mine are pimps. We can all rob a bank; we can all sell drugs. Being a pimp is a whole other thing.

So, to say Barack Obama is progress is saying that he's the first black person that is qualified to be president. That's not black progress. That's white progress.

Wealth is not about having a lot of money; it's about having a lot of options.

The advantage that my children have is that my children are encountering the nicest white people that America has ever produced. Let’s hope America keeps producing nicer white people.

I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity.

Most people don't realize this, but you can eat organic, all natural, gluten-free food without telling everyone around you.

Smart is knowing if you're dumb. Knowing when to shut up and to listen to people that are smarter than you.

You know the world is messed up when the tallest man in the NBA is Chinese, the best golfer is black, and the best rapper is white.

I miss him in so many ways, but right now I miss him in the way you always miss someone when you're single among a room full of couples.

We have not reached the consensus that to eat is a basic human right. This is an ethical crisis. This is a crisis of faith.

Epic love story has only love between two people but do not have 'they lived happily ever after

Every day, whatever you do, you trade a day of your life for it.

Hold each moment you create on your sacred journey close to your heart, for that is the location where your memory will be deposited.

Free will is the sensation of making a choice. The sensation is real, but the choice seems illusory. Laws of physics determine the future.

I was wearing corn plasters above and below my toes and taping my ankles twice.

I pledge tonight to be Mayor for all of the people of this city - for one Chicago.

My mother was a very wise and strong person.

My greatest competition is, well, me.