Money sometimes makes fools of important persons, but it may also make important persons of fools.

A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.

Good evening, Mr. and Mrs. America from border to border and coast to coast and all the ships at sea. Let's go to press.

The best way to get along is never to forgive an enemy or forget a friend.

An optimist is someone who gets treed by a lion but enjoys the scenery.

Never above you. Never below you. Always beside you.

She's been on more laps than a napkin.

I usually get my stuff from people who promised somebody else that they would keep it a secret.

Broadway is a main artery of New York life - the hardened artery.

Too many people expect wonders from democracy, when the most wonderful thing of all is just having it.

We must not indulge in unfavorable views of mankind, since by doing it we make bad men believe they are no worse than others, and we teach the good that they are good in vain.

We are overhasty to speak as if God did not manifest himself by our silent feeling, and make his love felt through ours.

Your body isn't just a body. It's an ecosystem.

It isn't something of which most of us are aware, but we human beings are 'marked' with a certain strange feature, and that is: We want to change.

To regret deeply is to live afresh.

Comedians are always going to be in the showbiz middle class, you're not Brad Pitt; you're never going to be Sam Rockwell or Shia LaBeouf or Leo DiCaprio. You're a comic.

Without pain, we couldn't know joy.

Integration begins the day after the minds of the people are desegregated.

A traveller at Sparta, standing long upon one leg, said to a Lacedaemonian, "I do not believe you can do as much." "True," said he, "but every goose can."

I guess there's just a time for doing dumb things.

You can prevent your opponent from defeating you through defense, but you cannot defeat him without taking the offensive.