Mort was hurt by this. It was one thing not to want to marry someone, but quite another to be told they didn't want to marry you.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

Endurance of life problems, spirit of survival.

The process of maturing is an art to be learned an effort to be sustained. By the age of fifty you have made yourself what you are and if it is good it is better than your youth.

Throughout its history, the international Olympic Committee has struggled to spread its ideal of fraternity, friendship, peace and universal understanding.

What could be and should be can’t be until God is ready for it to be.

I've never made any choice or done anything that wasn't what I think it should be. I've never compromised, but I do listen.

The ideal pre-show meal I think is pho, the Vietnamese soup. It's very light and good for you, and then the broth is great for the throat.

Show me a country where the bombs had to fallShow me the ruins of buildings so tallAnd I'll show you a young landWith many reasons whyThere but for fortune, go you or IYou or I.

It's a terrible thing that your life turns into a good story.

Religion is against women's rights and women's freedom. In all societies women are oppressed by all religions.

I believe you need to be educated about what you want to do in life, but I don't believe you actually need college to get you there.