Most college students are not as smart as most college presidents.

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.

Everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you're climbing it.

If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.

Being kind is more important than being right.

I just wish we knew a little less about his urethra and a little more about his arms sales to Iran.

I don't like food that's too carefully arranged; it makes me think that the chef is spending too much time arranging and not enough time cooking. If I wanted a picture I'd buy a painting.

Everyone starts out being an atheist. No one is born with belief in anything. Infants are atheists until they are indoctrinated.

People will generally accept facts as truth only if the facts agree with what they already believe.

Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.

Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.

It’s interesting how we can connect so deeply with friends so different from ourselves. In fact, perhaps it’s these differences ultimately bonding us the most. The opportunity to expand our horizons.

The Bible is not my book and Christianity is not my religion. I could never give assent to the long complicated statements of Christian dogma.

You have actors who begin at a certain young age and there's very little change in their technique and the depth of their performances; they're the same 30 years later.

The past is all we know of the future.

We learn so many things from golf: how to suffer, for instance.

Sorry is the fool who trades his soul for a corvette Thinks he'll get the girl he'll only get the mechanic.

I don't feel like a survivor. I feel left behind.

Jason Lee made me laugh all the time because he's so big, and I love how goofy bodies can be.

There are many things that are thorns to our hopes until we have attained them, and envenomed arrows to our hearts when we have.

Lord, Lord, how subject we old men are to this vice of lying!