My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fibre and that I am therefore excused from saving universes.

He hoped and prayed that there wasn't an afterlife. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped that there wasn't an afterlife.

We can't win against obsession. They care, we don't. They win.

The Guide says there is an art to flying", said Ford, "or rather a knack. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Time is the worst place, so to speak, to get lost in, as Arthur Dent could testify, having been lost in both time and space a good deal. At least being lost in space kept you busy.

The bowler approached the wicket at a lope, a trot, and then a run. He suddenly exploded in a flurry of arms and legs, out of which flew a ball.

and then I decided I was a lemon for a couple of weeks.

Zaphod did not want to tangle with them and, deciding that just as discretion is the better part of valor, so was cowardice is the better part of discretion, he valiantly hid himself in a closet.

Just believe everything I tell you, and it will all be very, very simple.""Ah, well, I'm not sure I believe that.

He was alone with his thoughts. They were extremely unpleasant thoughts and he would rather have had a chaperon.

He would insult the Universe. That is, he would insult everybody in it. Individually, personally, one by one, and (this was the thing he really decided to grit his teeth over) in alphabetical order.

When we think of all the beatitudes in life, our heart shall be merry.

People have a hunger to experience the spectacular, but the Lord is supernatural.

Every lover is, in his heart, a madman, and, in his head, a minstrel.

The average pencil is seven inches long with just a half-inch eraser - in case you thought optimism was dead.

Mountains are not stadiums where I satisfy my ambition to achieve, they are the cathedrals where I practice my religion.

The good Lord has blessed me with a great journey.

...I think he revalued everything in his house according to the measure of response it drew from her well-loved eyes.

I wanted my photographs to be as powerful as the last thing a person sees or remembers before death.

Most countries want to bring their people together and tear down physical, commercial and cultural barriers. Anyone who proposes separating them is out of line.

Modern Hinduism, modern Jainism, and Buddhism branched off at the same time. For some period, each seemed to have wanted to outdo the others in grotesqueness and humbuggism.