[My] dream writers room: "'Taxi.' I need to write for someone named Judd."

Don't be a jerk. Try to love everyone. Give more than you take. And do it despite the fact that you only really like about seven out of 500 people.

College is the reward for surviving high school. Most people have great fun stories from college and nightmare stories from high school.

Eventually, the nerds and the geeks will have their day.

For me, until I know that the audience really gets what I'm trying to communicate I'm not done.

In the writing, I'm just trying to go deeper, emotionally, and learn more about myself and reveal more and find a way to connect with people in new ways.

We are at this weird moment where there's an economic model that supports creativity. People are demanding something new and fresh.

I am always driven by the terror of humiliation.

Every joke is an experiment. When you sit, alone, and write a script, or just a joke, you really have no idea if it will succeed.

I think that everything I do tends to root for the underdog.

The audience doesn't care that most of happened. They just want a good movie.

The candle glimmers but an hour. The nightLooms in its ancient hunger. Would you knowThe tragedy of human love and need?Gaze on the stars, then on a brother's face!

It tastes like water spiked with strange.

Dreams, after all, are insubstantial things, like mist itself.

Our friend Chewy doesn’t speak much, but he chews a lot of tobacco so we call him Chewbacco.

I love being a lawyer more than I like writing.

Female sexuality is presented in our culture as a male fantasy, which doesn't include the reality of the abuse, the pleasure, the pain, the power, the complexity of women's sexuality.

A good heart cannot lye

People like to compare something to something that they know. Even with Chris Rock, they say he's like Richard Pryor or Eddie Murphy.

It's an interesting thing to be in your forties and evaluate success and take ownership of some disasters and some pain and try to forgive a little bit - yourself and others.

The media and their journalists are merely megaphones for stupidity, the verb par excellence.