My father left Ireland because he did not want to muck horse manure for the rest of his life, and he wanted to come to New York.

Racism isn't born, folks, it's taught. I have a two-year-old son. You know what he hates? Naps! End of list.

I think we should take Iraq and Iran and combine them into one country and call it Irate. All the pissed off people live in one place and get it over with.

Life Sucks,get a helmet

You know why the French hate us so much? Thay gave us the croissant. And you know what we did with it? We turned it into our croissandwich, thank you very much.

Why hate someone for the color of their skin when there are much better reasons to hate them?

Crisis doesn't create character; it reveals it.

Ann Romney talking about middle class moms is like Chris Christie talking about a salad

There we were in the middle of a sexual revolution wearing clothes that guaranteed we wouldn't get laid.

I'm really happy I went to a Catholic school because a lot of the repressive tactics they use make for great senses of humor.

What firefighters, and people in our military and cops do is separate from what the rest of us do, basically these people say "I'm going to protect all these strangers."

If you want to love God, love the less-fortunate one. If you want to see God, look through the eyes of a hungry child.

Dismiss any thought that leads to discouragement.

The condition which high friendship demands is the ability to do without it.

To sit in the shade on a fine day and look upon verdure is the most perfect refreshment.

The pleasure of the soul appears to be found in the journey of discovery, the unfolding revelation of expanded insight and experience.

I was one of the boys who made passes at girls who wore glasses. Any girl who was smarter than me - that was a huge turn-on.

The book of Genesis, a farrago of nonsense so wholly absurd that even Sunday-school scholars have to be threatened with Hell to make them accept it.

I don't think there is any other professional Bible scholar who is more respected and honored [like Frank Moore Cross].

To me, it's just that social media is allowing people to be in charge of their own narratives.

I thank my dad for my mental longevity and for the fact we played against better competition.