My father never lived to see his dream come true of an all-Yiddish-speaking Canada.

I don't really dissect comedy. Nothing kills off humor more than overanalyzing it.

Authors always take rejection badly. They equate it with infanticide.

By being in harmony with your environment you are able to control more precisely what happens.

All the things I really like to do are either immoral illegal or fattening.

The deadliest feeling that can be offered to a woman is pity.

While other kids were out playing and doing healthy things, I read an ancient judo book with a neck hold that was fatal to so many people they finally dropped it from judo.

And the thought of that makes me want to open a vein, experience pain, know I'm alive, despite this living death.

To think new thoughts you have to break the bones in your head

Look at what you could have won!

I hoped to win a medal and hoped it would be gold. I knew I was good but didn't know I would be the one to score something that had never been done before.

Here's a quarter, call someone who cares.