My father wasn't much for show business. He was an insurance man - very well-liked, very warm. He had a lot of friends.

Italians are fantastic people, really. They can work you over in an alley while singing an opera.

No matter where you go in this world, you will always find a Jew sitting in the beach chair next to you.

I think if I took therapy, the doctor would quit. He'd just pick up the couch and walk out of the room.

When you enter a room, you have to kiss his ring. I don't mind, but he has it in his back pocket.

When you stand alone and sell yourself, you can't please everyone. But when you're different, you can last.

Who picks your clothes - Stevie Wonder?

I always rib people, but nobody ever gives me a hard time. I don't know why. Maybe they're afraid of what I might say. There's probably a lesson in that somewhere, but I don't know what it is.

Yeah, I make fun of blacks, and why not? I'm not a black.

I used to play golf. I wanted to be a better player, but after a while I realized I'd always stink. And that's when I really started to enjoy the game.

Some people say funny things - but I say things funny.

if you have returned in my life then either its a deception or its a dream...from now no nightmares onwards

The way to live well is to feel intensely.

...then we went skinny dippin' and did things that frighten the fish...Character, Shelby Eatonton, from the movie, Steel Magnolias.

I was in a little punk band and we put out a few punk records that weren't very political, at all.

Joe Biden was spotted with a bruise on his face that was apparently caused by his dog. I guess they collided when they both went after the same tennis ball.

'I beg your pardon?' Alice said with a puzzled air. 'I'm not offended,' said Humpty Dumpty.

I am a tender, beautiful and loving guy that happens to slap a photographer now and then because they get in my way.

There are eyes everywhere. No blind spot left. What shall we dream of when everything becomes visible? We'll dream of being blind.

Ted Cruz is tailored his message for a specific conservative evangelical. I think it's limited his appeal. I think he has the ability to appeal to everybody.

When someone between twenty and forty says, apropos of a work of art, 'I know what I like,' he is really saying 'I have no taste of my own but accept the taste of my cultural milieu.