My goal and my career is definitely not to be famous. That's a really horrible goal, just to be famous for the sake of having fame.

If you have a dream, just lie about it. Lie your way unto your dreams.

Joel McHale is so money, he should be printed on money.

In prison, inmates sometimes use Cheetos and grape juice as makeup. I wouldn't use that beauty regimen around Britney Spears - she might lick your face off!

I loved New Jersey. I thought it was the greatest place in the world because on Halloween kids could start trick or treating right after school. Isn't that great?

I used humor as survival, as a weapon and as comfort.

People have always said since TV was invented what a cultural wasteland it is but I think it is the worst and the best. It is the golden age of television.

I think we are as screwed as a culture as we are saved as a culture.

I don't think the NFL had the slightest intention of taking me, except as maybe a water boy.

Yes, I would say my comedy is grunge, evidenced by the fact my jokes have put an end to big-hair glam comedy.

I knew I wanted to be an actor. I just kept saying, "Until somebody tells me to stop, until I have to go get a real job, and until I'm practically homeless, I'm not gonna get one."

From the time we're born until we die, we're kept busy with artificial stuff that isn't important.

A genuine feminist politics always brings us from bondage to freedom, from lovelessness to loving... There can be no love without justice.

If you're not paying for it through the health plan, you pay for it in the emergency room.

You can only see in someone else what you see in yourself.

My first debate in high school--"Resolved: Girls are no good"--and I won!

The word Hare is the word that calls upon the energy that's around the Lord. If you say the mantra enough, you build up an identification with God.

India is using troops in Kashmir. They are losing the battle of heart and minds. It's like treating cancer with dispirin.

I think there's a phenomenon of people who want to be around something that seems "dangerous." It makes them feel more real.

Error is acceptable as long as we are young; but one must not drag it along into old age.

I do like taking on responsibility, sometimes too much. But I was aware of that early on and it's something that came up in the previous set of interviews, and that is the actor‛s contribution.