My life was once whiskey, tears and cigarettes... now it's snot, tears and a color of poop. Bliss. I do miss the whiskey, though.

Instead of a river, God often gives us a brook, which may be running today and dried up tomorrow. Why? To teach us not to rest in our blessings, but in the blesser Himself.

Prayer is not so much an act as it is an attitude - an attitude of dependency, dependency upon God.

It is not the absence of sin but the grieving over it which distinguishes the child of God from empty professors.

The Bible is no lazy man's book! Much of its treasure, like the valuable minerals stored in the bowels of the earth, only yield up themselves to the diligent seeker.

True liberty is not the power to live as we please, but to live as we ought.

Grace can neither be bought, earned, or won by the creature. If it could be, it would cease to be grace.

The great mistake made by most of the Lord’s people is in hoping to discover in themselves that which is to be found in Christ alone.

Growing in grace is a deepening realization of our nothingness; it is a heartfelt recognition that we are not worthy of the least of God's mercies.

Unbelief is infectious! The unbelief of one strengthens the unbelief of another, just as the faith of one strengthens the faith of another.

Cameron Diaz was so cute at the MTV Movie Awards when she pulled her skirt up and wiped her armpits.

I understand why King Solomon asked for wisdom from God. For wisdom is like oil to a lamp, what would be the essence of having a lamp without oil in darkness?.

Mother said we had reached the Age of Reason and had to be good now. We must have because we wanted Willy Starr instead.

Folks double my age and older often run down a conversation tracking a vanishing world that will, with the passing of their memory, vanish entirely.

A good thing to have up your sleeve is a sanctified funny-bone.

The joy with which we denigrate each others' efforts, I hate that.

As you can tell from watching the show, I'm not a strong joke writer per se.

I wanted to be the conduit for somebody else's experiences, filtered through me, and passed on to other people. Which is the job description, really.

The person who thinks I worship the devil and kill animals is just as important as someone who makes an interpretation that's closer to what I intended.

When I was five I had violin lessons.

The problem with competition is that it takes away the requirement to set your own path, to invent your own method, to find a new way.