My mom shot and killed her last husband. Yeah, my dad used to say "Hey, dodged that bullet. Ha ha."

Screw normal. You know why? 'Cause if you're normal, the crowd will accept you. But if you're deranged, the crowd will make you their leader.

Everyone has an enemy. It's why God gave us baseball bats. Well, He gave us trees, but we knew what He meant.

I don't fail. I succeed at finding out what doesn't work.

Take the time to smell the roses. Sooner or later, you'll inhale a bee and die.

The normal make a living. The deranged make history.

I think when you sit alone with your brain too much, your own brain starts to rebel against you.

Socrates said, the unexamined life is not worth living. My dad said, Booty - mmm mmm.

I don't believe in right or left; I don't believe in Santa or Satan. I believe in things I can touch - like vodka and Oreos.

Anyone can have a relationship but if you're dating a woman who's so crazy in bed that if you aren't wearing your Kevlar one night you might never see daylight again... that's exciting.

The only thing that ever made me want to be a wife-beater is being called one. Your honor, can I have five minutes to make her not a liar, please?

Nobody should know what's waiting for them. If you knew your future, why... it would take all the fun out of living.

Chiron reminds us that only through recognising and accepting our inner wounds can we find true healing.

At a certain point, I just put the building and the art impulse together. I decided that building was a legitimate way to make sculpture.

... I had always written but I never took it seriously. It was a way of life, not a living.

All my friends who wanted to write had got nowhere trying to write the great European novel. So I deliberately steered clear of that and set out to write something story-led.

Is there anything better than making a kid laugh?

Understanding created by the intellect cannot be acquired by means of the occult, only by the aid of the zodiac, bringing forth that small flame by whose light part of the future may be discerned.

I decided years ago that if I'm going to keep teaching contemplation, then the last years of my life should be contemplative.

You can be a complainer. Or you can be an achiever. But you can't be both

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