My own books drive themselves. I know roughly where a book is going to end, but essentially the story develops under my fingers. It's just a matter of joining the dots.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

Keeping your head above the water only works if the air is clean.

It is more blessed to give than to receive.

Honors and rewards fall to those who show their good qualities in action.

You cannot lecture another people about what you think is right or wrong based on your value system unless you're willing to accept others imposing their value system on you.

My work is not about my life history. It's not about the story of my neurosis

The world conspires to help those who are in love with the beauty of their dreams.

The limits of tyrants are prescribed by the endurance of those whom they oppose.

We live, we die, we are remembered, we are forgotten.

I'm proud to be associated with the liberation of Assata Shakur.

You can't find a hermit to teach you herming, because of course that rather spoils the whole thing.