My professional dreams were coming true while I was living a personal nightmare.

I can smell bullshit from a mile away but it's so much harder to detect when it's around you all day.

I'm a late-night guy.

I can always get better. A lot of my ex-girlfriends don't think I'm funny.

I don't laugh out loud at comics a lot.

Here's how you know that you're really drunk: when you get into a taxi cab and you think the fare is the time.

Losing my mind sounds so pessimistic. I prefer the term winning my insanity.

When people refer to 'Back in the Day,' it was a Wednesday. Just a little fun fact for you.

I'm quitting the business today. I'm going to open up an appliance store, I've always really been into toasters. I'm giving it all up.

I don't write any of my material down. I like to improvise and be spontaneous.

Trolls look for reasons to hate but really what they are mad at is the fact they are not included in anything ever.

The problem with satisfaction is it's a bottomless pit

Posthumous: It sounds like the name of a Roman gladiator, an unconquered gladiator. At least that’s what poor Posthumous would like to believe. It gives him courage.

I hope this will help new moms not feel alone or desperate, and that there is no shame in their feelings. PPD is out of their control, but the treatment and healing process is not.

Composers are in some ways the last frontier of musician that gets a paycheck for their musical services.

You can make up your own opinion, but you can't make up your own facts, go sell.

I love movies, and if the right thing comes along I'm so interested.

"All roads lead there child. You should know that." "Detention?"

The thing is that I had no fear; no anxiety. I had this peace come over me and I just knew that word from the Lord was truth.

[Making movies] you're not trying to capture reality, you're trying to capture a photograph of reality.

My CIA godfather told me he'd never heard any American speak Japanese so well.