My thoughts by night are often filled With visions false as fair: For in the past alone, I build My castles in the air.

There are two reasons for drinking wine...when you are thirsty, to cure it; the other, when you are not thirsty, to prevent it... prevention is better than cure.

Seamen three! what men be ye? Gotham's three Wise Men we be. Whither in your bowl so free? To rake the moon from out the sea. The bowl goes trim. The moon doth shine, And our ballast is old wine.

Clouds on clouds, in volumes driven, curtain round the vault of heaven.

The juice of the grape is the liquid quintessence of concentrated sunbeams.

The waste of plenty is the resource of scarcity.

He kept at true good humor's mark The social flow of pleasure's tide: He never made a brow look dark, Nor caused a tear, but when he died.

Marriage may often be a stormy lake, but celibacy is almost always a muddy horsepond.

The mountain sheep are sweeter, But the valley sheep are fatter. We therefore deemed it meeter To carry off the latter.

I never failed to convince an audience that the best thing they could do was to go away.

Sir, I have quarrelled with my wife; and a man who has quarrelled with his wife is absolved from all duty to his country.

I know your soul. Everything else is just an ornament.

In the struggle for survival, the cutest win out at the expense of the less cute because they appeal more to celebrities and, through them, to a live television audience.

My ancestors wandered lost in the wilderness for forty years because even in biblical times men would not stop to ask directions.

You will trust God to the degree you know you are loved by Him.

I had a marketing idea that everybody hated, decency is sexy.

Everything I do in my life is very aggressive.

He who trusts secrets to a servant makes him his master

Nobody ever sees this part,” I said. “It doesn’t matter if it’s pretty.” “So it’s like track six on an album,” Cole said.

The nature of language may determine what most people say, but I always speak my own meaning.

Of a truth, men are mystically united: a mystic bond of brotherhood makes all men one.