My type of humor is me not caring whether people know what I'm talking about or not.

Generally speaking, I think it is fair to say that I am a friend to the creatures of the Earth when I am not busy eating them or wearing them.

A stopped clock is correct twice a day, but a sundial can be used to stab someone, even at nighttime.

Specificity is the soul of narrative.

I am not beautiful, so I don't know why I'm making myself ugly. But the mustache stays.

All I can ask from society is that it please stop telling me why I should like sports.

I actually own a copy of my own book; that's how dedicated I am as an author.

There is no ritual that enhances creativity other than just starting.

My career as a magazine writer was largely prefaced on the idea of curiosity, to go on adventures and weasel my way into the lives of people that I admire.

A literary agent is nothing but a cheap salesman (or woman); while a writer is a cheap salesman (or woman) who also has to actually write the books.

The villain of any story is often the most compelling character.

Commitment is an act, not a word

Make yourself an honest man, and then you may be sure that there is one less scoundrel in the world.

Everyone has their own varying means of measuring thing. Sometimes people can agree on something, but other times they can't.

Learn as much as you can while you are young, since life becomes too busy later.

The longer I'm alive, the more I realize how little I know. Pretending that you know everything about every topic, and being very vocal about it? That's an instant turnoff.

Soap operas got nothing on my family history.

You have to be the first, best or different.

It's not a very sane thing to try to be great all the time.

I was too impatient to work at the usual duties assigned women on newspapers.

As usual, no one's ever around when you need them.