My way of looking at the world is that if it is true, it is funny and it is dark. No matter how dark it is, I just think it is funny. I can't help it.

I got a huge knot in my stomach because if Antarctica could talk, it would be saying only one thing: you don't belong here. (277)

The sooner you learn it's on you to make life interesting, the better off you'll be.

I think because I try to keep things as real as I can, or I try to start from a place of reality, I almost don't have the imagination to write a book that's not set where I am.

This is why you must love life: one day you're offering up your social security number to the Russian Mafia; two weeks later you're using the word calve as a verb.

I'm not too good when exposed to people

Maybe that’s what religion is, hurling yourself off a cliff and trusting that something bigger will take care of you and carry you to the right place.

I'd say I never considered myself a great architect. I'm more of a creative problem solver with good taste and a soft spot for logistical nightmares.

Your mission statement says Galer Street is based on global "connectitude." (You people don't just think outside the box, you think outside the dictionary!)

My strength as a TV writer was my total lack of interest in television.

Anything I write I ask myself: Is it true, is it entertaining?

Embrace being perfectly imperfect. Learn from your mistakes and forgive yourself, you’ll be happier.

My Epitaph:THIS is Plan B

Optimism is essential to achievement and it is also the foundation of courage and of true progress.

I was bold in the pursuit of knowledge, never fearing to follow truth and reason to whatever results they led, and bearding every authority which stood in their way.

She should have know that villains often come with pretty faces.

I don't like listening to my music, not even new pieces. Generally, they sound pretty much like I expected them to sound, so it's what I wanted, and that's it.

The terrorist attacks upon our country changed the way that we live forever and provided us with a cruel reminder that freedom and liberty have a price.

To keep up appearances, I stomp my room and slam the door.

Literacy is not the end of education nor even the beginning.

Now I'm at the point where I can bring the cursor just about anywhere.